With Pottermore re-introducing the Sorting Hat, many people are once again having identity crises about what house they belong in. Pottermore put me in Hufflepuff once again, but I wanted to write this for all my people unsure of where they belong.
I wrote about my first Pottermore sorting here and I'm going to try not to repeat everything I said back then.
Recently, this was going around Facebook. I really don't like the idea of being part of two houses, because the point of doing this is to see where you would be if you went to Hogwarts, which would be just one house. However, I'm addicted to personality quizzes and felt it necessary to see what this thought my secondary house would be. I got Gryffinclaw. Whoops. Hello, identity crisis.
I decided to ask other people what they saw me as. About three quarters of them said Hufflepuff, but the rest were pretty evenly split between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw. I have to wonder if that number of people said I was a Hufflepuff because they see those qualities in me or because I have self-identified as a Hufflepuff for four and a half years.
Until the past year or so, I completely discounted Gryffindor as a place I might get sorted. I genuinely believed I wasn't brave. When asking my friends what they thought, one of them said, "You have the courage of 10 Gryffindors put together." As I pick through my distorted sense of self, I can see that I am actually a pretty courageous person. I've gotten Gryffindor in sorting results many times over the past few years. I try to imagine my 11-year-old self who would have been sorted, and honestly, that girl was pretty fearless. Not to mention, I am definitely a person with an appreciation for adventure. I can definitely see why I'd get sorted into Gryffindor.
My clouded vision of myself has also made me think I'm not smart enough to be in Ravenclaw. Now, I think I have a pretty decent wit. Ravenclaws have an appreciation for individuality, which is something that I share. Plus, I'm a bit of a punk-ass book jockey. Again, going back to my 11-year-old self, she is easy to imagine as a Ravenclaw. She was that kid who read for pleasure more than many kids and therefore had a more extensive vocabulary than most, and boy did she want everyone to know it. She took pleasure in using words her peers didn't understand and loved to "help" the other kids by blurting out the word they were struggling with as they had to read out loud to the class.
Knowing all this, how can I know for sure that I am a Hufflepuff? I could easily be a Gryffindor or a Ravenclaw. I think about all of my relationships and wonder if I'm really loyal. I think about how many people would laugh at the idea of me being patient. I think about the people who think I'm lazy and wasting my life. But, again, I have to look beyond my self-image and my projected image to look at my true self. I definitely value loyalty, and because of that, if someone makes me feel I have been betrayed, I am very deeply wounded, often beyond repair. I may be impatiently awaiting "Captain America: Civil War", but I am so patient with the toddlers with whom I spend most of my time. I have depression and anxiety, and that can look like laziness sometimes, but truly I have a good work ethic. Justice is certainly something I value immensely. I take it very, very personally when injustice takes place, especially when I feel people I love have been treated unjustly. When I think of what I most value, it is truth, which isn't always necessarily listed as a Hufflepuff value, but it goes hand-in-hand with justice. I am a little bit addicted to truth. Lying is the single greatest way to offend me. I seek truth in every aspect of my life. I suppose that's why I take this Hogwars crisis extra seriously. Any courage I have is rooted in loyalty and the pursuit of truth and justice. Also, Hufflepuff is the most accepting house, and I get a little fireball of rage in my chest when people are needlessly exclusive.
We're never going to get a definitive answer as to what house we belong to. I've realized that I could be just fine as a Gryffindor or a Ravenclaw. Perhaps some people look at me and think my best qualities lie within the values of those houses, but my heart is most rooted in the values of Hufflepuff. I may not always feel like I'm good enough to be in Hufflepuff, but hey, Hufflepuff is the most accepting house, so I should probably stop worrying.
No comments:
Post a Comment